Wednesday 23 September 2015

Anger?

Anger?


Although anger is a very natural human emotion and feeling; it can have negative effects on those who allow it to control them, and adverse effects on those who around them. Anger can destroy relationships, health, property, and livelihood. It is also very powerful and can vary in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury.  The latter can be destructive.  It can rage through a person, creating a desire for revenge and pushing a person to strike out at the object of his anger.  Because it is natural it is impossible for a person to avoid it completely.  It is however possible to understand anger and thus control it.

Because anger is often associated with ‘fight or flight responses’, it is often difficult to separate an action that is done in self-defense (or to protect properties or families) from one that is done out of uncontrolled rage.   It is ok to feel anger but it is not acceptable when a person allows it to overtake him and drive him to act in an unacceptable way, sometimes even leading to a very harsh action.

Uncontrolled anger is one of the tools of Satan and it can lead to many evils and tragedies. That is why once Prophet Muhammad called it a hot coal on the heart of a descendant of Adam.  There is no full proof way to completely eliminate anger because it is a natural human emotion.
When I go through the lives of great personalities of the world I found they have given many technics how to control anger and how to channel it into acceptable actions. 

There are also distinct advantages to following the guidelines set out. Once a man came to Prophet Mohammad and said, “Messenger of God, teach me some words which I can live by.  Do not make them too much for me, in case I forget.”  He said, “Do not be angry”. He the Prophet also advised that performing ablution was an acceptable method of anger management.  He said, “Anger comes from Satan, Satan was created from fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when any of you is angry, he should perform ablution”. If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down.”

 Jesus was also the best psychologist and the best moral teacher. He understood anger and told how to deal with them. In the Sermon on the Mount he wen over his fundamental teaching on anger, contempt, and how to deal with interpersonal conflict. Jesus was saying that the emotion of anger is not a sinful but dangerous and to be careful! Be the first to say “I’m sorry” or to offer empathy and compassion. Of course, this is not fair, but do it anyway because God does it for you. You can “Forgive as the Lord forgave you” 

In the same way Lord Krishna explains getting angry is a four step process. While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for them, and from such attachment lust develops, and from lust anger arises.

 Let us follow the illustration below

1.    Our senses come In contact with a sense object. Sense object refers to anything that we see, hear, taste, touch or smell or even something that we think of in our minds.

2.    After the first point of contact we develop an attachment or liking for it.

3.    The obvious third step is to develop a desire (lust) to possess it or have it done our way.

4.     And finally when that does not occur, the emotion manifests as anger.

So it appears as though the problem first arises when the senses come in contact with their sense objects. Therefore, the easiest solution must be to just control our senses and nip it in the bud. Well, that’s easier said than done!
Thus anger is a normal, healthy emotion, but when chronic, explosive anger spirals out of control, it can have serious consequences for our relationships, our health, and our state of mind. 

 There are many techniques that can help us to be cool down and keep our anger in check. In such a situation focus on the physical sensations of anger, take some deep breaths, use your senses, stretch or massage areas of tension, slowly count to ten, and focus on the counting to let our rational mind catch up with our feelings.

Monday 14 September 2015

Zero to One


              If you want to build a better future, you must believe in secrets.


The great secret of our time is that there are still uncharted frontiers to explore and new inventions to create. In "Zero to One" , the book of  legendary entrepreneur and investor Peter Thiel shows how we can find singular ways to create those new things. 

Peter Thiel is a German American entrepreneur and the billionaire known for starting “Paypal” with Elon Musk and for being one of the first investors in Mark Zuckerburg’s Facebook.

I think Thiel Peter might be one of the top ten smartest people living on planet Earth today.
 
Fortunately today I have come across the goodreads author Peter Thiel, Zero To One.

I was also watching a few video interviews he did that had tremendous insight into his genius brain.
 
Here are 10 wonderful things I wrote down about Peter's perspective on life:

1. Avoid extreme worldviews: "Extreme pessimists find no point in doing anything. And extreme optimists find no need to do anything. They both converge on doing nothing."
 
2. Conventional wisdom leads to you competing for something worthless: “Elite students climb confidently until they reach a level of competition sufficiently intense to beat their dreams out of them. Higher education is the place where people who had big plans in high school get stuck in fierce rivalries with equally smart peers over conventional careers like management consulting and investment banking. For the privilege of being turned into conformists, students (or their families) pay hundreds of thousands of dollars in skyrocketing tuition that continues to outpace inflation. Why are we doing this to ourselves?” 
 
3. His advice to his younger self: "If you ever have to choose between status or substance, choose substance." He says we will all face that choice and our tendency is to go with social proof (what the masses perceive as the right choice) but we should avoid this.
 
 4. The modern education system is similar to the Church in the Dark Ages centuries ago: Peter compares it this way, "It had become a very corrupt institution. It was charging more and more for indulgences. People thought (In the 1500's) they could only get saved by going to the Church, just like people today believe that salvation involves getting a college diploma. And if you don’t get a college diploma that you're going to go to hell. I think my answer is, in some ways, like that of the reformers in the 16th century. it is the same disturbing answer -- that you're going to have to figure out your salvation on your own.
 
5. Why nerds seem to be so successful in life: Thiel observed how many big entrepreneurs like Mark Zuckerberg have Asperger Syndrome (which makes them socially awkward but less sensitive to societal norms), "We need to ask, what is it about our society where those of us who do not suffer from Asperger’s are at some massive disadvantage because we will be talked out of our interesting, original, creative ideas before they are even fully formed?
 
6. The most important question you can ask yourself: “Tell me something that’s true that very few people agree with you on.”
This is a very tricky question to answer.
 
Try it.
 
(Remember that it has to be something that is true not something made up)... The reason this is such a vital thing to ask is that most big breakthroughs come from catching trends that the average human doesn't have the vision or contrarian viewpoint to see. 
 
 
7. Would he go to a university again if he could do it all over?: "It's possible I would do it again," he said, but also that he would, "think about it much harder. I would ask questions, 'Why am I doing this? Am I doing this just because I have good grades and test scores? And because I think it’s prestigious? Or am I doing this because I'm extremely passionate about practicing law? So I think there are good answers and there are bad answers and my, sort of, retrospective on my early 20s is that I was way too focused on the wrong answers at the time. 
 
8. Seek no competition: "Most business books tell you how you should compete more effectively, and mine goes somewhat against the grain to tell you that you should not compete," Thiel says, "Figure out something that nobody else is doing and look to create a monopoly in some area that's been underdeveloped. 
 
He goes on to say:

"Every moment in business happens only once. The next Bill Gates will not build an operating system. The next Larry Page or Sergey Brin won’t make a search engine. And the next Mark Zuckerberg won’t create a social network. If you are copying these guys, you aren’t learning from them.” 
 
9. It's not an education that you want, it's knowledge: Peter explains, "I don’t like the word education because it is such an extraordinary abstraction. I'm very much in favor of learning. I'm much more skeptical of credentialing or the abstract called education. So there are all these granule questions. Like, what is it that you're learning? Why are you learning it? Are you going to college because it's a four year party? Is it a consumption decision? Is it an investment decision, where you're investing in your future? Is it insurance? Or is a tournament, where you're just beating other people? Are our elite universities really like Studio 54 where it's like an exclusive night club?"
 
This is why I speak about knowledge so much. The world is now entering into the age of the "Knowledge Society." It's not the information age anymore. It's the knowledge age...
 
10. Being part of something new and exciting is the best way to control your life's destiny: "A startup is the largest endeavor over which you can have definite mastery. You can have agency not just over your own life, but over a small and important part of the world. It begins by rejecting the unjust tyranny of chance. You are not a lottery ticket." 

Thursday 10 September 2015

Life is a Beautiful gift of God

One day, you’ll just be a memory to some people. Do your best to be a good one.

Life is a beautiful gift of god .Try to live and learn from each and every moment of it.
These are the life lessons  from “The Last Lecture” by the late Randy Pausch – the lecture that captivated the world and now inspires millions.

Experience is what we get when you didn’t get what we wanted.
Never lose the child-like wonder.

If we do something which is pioneering, we will get arrows in the back. But at the end of the day, a whole lot of people will have a whole lot of fun.

Be good at something; it makes you valuable.

If you live your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself, and the dreams will come to you.
Stay positive no matter what, but not in denial. 

Make things fun.

Dream a big dream.

Learn from all the people in your life.
   
Dare to do things differently.

Find the right place to nurture your dreams.

Don’t hate others. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

Don’t have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

Don’t over do; keep your limits.

Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.

Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.

Dream more while you are awake.

Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin 
 your present happiness.

Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.

No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

Smile and laugh more.
 You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Call your family often.

Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.

Try to make at least three people smile each day.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.


Put GOD first in anything and everything that you think, say and do.

GOD heals everything.

Do the right things.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
The best is yet to come.

Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.

If you believe in GOD you will always be happy. So, Be happy...